I recommend as AWESOME! The fun thing about computers is that they always do what you tell them to do, and occasionally what you want. But people…people hear what they want to hear and not necessarily what you’re telling them. The unholy hybrid of the two is the system administrator. Enter: the Bastard Operator From Hell (BOFH). A must-read series of pseudo-history for anyone whose job involves helping lusers enter the 21st century kicking and screaming; well, actually it starts off drooling and knuckle-dragging until they ask for help.
Not to be outdone, I change his login directory to the null device, set his path to “.” and redefine the command “news” to execute a script in his old login directory to send a nasty message to the equal opportunities officer, then delete itself.